Saturday, February 27, 2010
I love my daughter more than anything, but before she was born was a difficult time. Pregnancy was not kind to me. But that is a story for another day.

When my daughter was born, I was scared and unsure. I loved my baby, but I did not bond immediately, as the books say. Bonding took several weeks. I breastfed Cailyn until she was 6 months old. It was a wonderful yet very trying situation. I feared I wasn't making enough Milk etc. Thanks to some wonderful online friends I stuck it through. Cracked, bleeding nipples and all.

My husband went back to work two weeks after she was born, and I was terrified, I was going to be alone, what if something happened? Well, it didn't and we were just fine, but the fear was real.

I think the thing that I found most interesting was the first month of her life was not at all like they said it would be. The books and magazines portrayed this wonderful, magical time, but it was difficult and strange, uncharted territory. I learned the ways of my daughter, what she liked, what she didn't and things got easier.
There are times that she is difficult and doesn't want to agree to anything, but I know we all get like that.

I love my daughter and I see the magic in her now. I would not change her for the world. I can not imagine life without her. I honestly don't want to imagine life without her.

I love being a mother now, and though it was hard in the beginning, I have grown and changed and learned so much from being a parent.


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